Couples Counselling

Gottman Method Couples Counselling

The Gottman Method

The Gottman Method is a practical, research-informed approach to couples counselling developed by psychologists Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman. Drawing on decades of research with couples, the approach helps partners better understand their relationship patterns, communicate more effectively, manage conflict, and reconnect emotionally. Rather than focusing on eliminating disagreements, the Gottman Method recognizes that conflict is a normal part of relationships — what matters is how couples navigate those difficult moments and find their way back to one another. Counselling may explore areas such as friendship and connection, trust, intimacy, communication, shared goals, and the ways each partner can feel heard, understood, and valued.

Getting Started

The Gottman approach starts with 3 initial appointments:

• Session 1: We will talk about the history of your relationship, areas of concern, and your goals as a couple in these sessions. Following the first session, you will receive access to the Gottman Connect platform, where you will each separately complete an in-depth questionnaire that will generate a Relationship Report that will inform our sessions together.

• Session 2: We will meet indiviudally to learn more about your personal histories and to hear your thoughts, feelings and perceptions individually.

• Session 3: We will go over the results on the Relationship Report, discuss recommendations and together clarify and anchor our goals for our sessions together.

It’s recommended for the initial 3 sessions, that we book 9o min sessions in order to allow enough time to settle in and dive into the process.

After the initial 3 sessions, we can move to 75 min sessions, or we can keep the 90 minute format. We can discuss this further in Session 3.

 Length of therapy

The length of therapy will depend on your specific needs and goals. In the course of therapy, we will establish points to evaluate your satisfaction and progress. As you gain traction on the work together, we will meet less frequently in order for you to test out your new skills.

Although you may end counselling whenever you wish, it is most helpful to have at least one session together to summarize progress, define the work that remains, and say goodbye.

The Gottman Method recommends four follow-up sessions, scheduled every 6 months, once you reach your goals. Research shows that these follow-up sessions significantly decrease the chances of falling back into previous, unhelpful patterns. The purpose of these follow-up sessions is to fine-tune your relationship skills if needed and evaluate the effectiveness of the therapy received.

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